Winter Is Coming

(source)

The hottest club this winter has to be fleshy shades of pinks, reds and beiges to counteract the overbearing, over-saturated shades of yellow and orange coming through this season. South African winters are very dizzying as the sky gets bluer and the sun supernovas into yellows so bright they grow macabre but, at the same time, the temperature barely rises above 20. Which I'm sure to all ye Northern Hemisphere kids is a breezy summer day, but my drying valley of bones cannot deal. If it could at least look like winter-- you know, overcast skies, wind, trees without leaves-- I might be able to get into the whole winter vibe, fantasise about layering textures, patterns and what not. Instead I have to deal with what looks like summer on steroids but feels like the depths of my soul.

You'd think this constant summer that's not summer would mean that Scandinavian brand of sadness would go away (you know, the unhappiness behind all our favourite Dutch/German paintings and shades of blue) but the not summer part intensifies it ten fold to a Saharan Sadness that won't go away. It's a lot if misplacement and not knowing how many jerseys to wear. The skies remain a cloudless, terrific shade of blue throughout all this.

Babble aside, you're thinking of a white Christmas, I'm imagining a brown winter filled with grandma motifs (rose patterns, porcelain, plastic covers), 24 hour mood lighting and lots of frumpy, asymmetrical lines. Nothing matters. Hail Satan.

 top: still from The Virgin Suicides c/o of Google Image search // left and right: stills from Twin Peaks c/o Google Image Search // stills from Xxplosive music video by Dope Saint Jude (screencaps)

 left: Teenage Gaze by Petra Collins // right: my friend, Lukhanyo at Liquidchef's two months ago

 top: The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert still (from tumblr) // bottom: Teenage Gaze by Petra Collins

 A.W.A.K.E. Fall 2015 Ready-to-Wear collection (from style.com)

 Teenage Gaze by Petra Collins

 The supreme babe, Zipho (Tony Gum Online)

 A Rookie Mag photo set entitled The Way Home

 Babyghost Fall 2015 Ready-to-Wear // pieces from the Central Saint Martins show including that of Samuel Guidong Yang and Matty Bovan (all photos from style.com)

 Bree in Desperate Housewives, c/o of Google Images

 Kirsten Dunst's pelvis, somewhere on Tumblr

Physical Education by Sipho Mpongo and Zipho/Tony, from Tony Gum

 The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert

 (Central Saint Martins show)

 From Zipho's tumblr

 Rookie Mag photoset entitled Twilight Shine

Still from Heathers.

I love all you dead gay sons. Tell me about your summers and all the vibrant shades you're envisioning this June/July.

MemoPad Notes

I want somebody / that can touch my body / who's lovin' everybody / but's lovin' nobody but me / and nobody can see / what me and her are doin' / in our spare time / that was our time / it isn't their time. 

Starry Room - Jaden Smith - CCV1

I should be applying to university or catching up on all the homework I keep missing because of my sleep shaped procrastination but instead I'm really upset that RapGenius described Jaden Smith's Starry Room as "Jaden Smith wrote this song about Stella Hudgens, and as an apology to her for messing up in their relationship. He also apologizes to his past girlfriends." Yeah, OK, RapGenius, and the sky is just molecules scattering blue light from the sun. 

These are all notes I've left on my phone that I thought I would journal.














Post format heavily inspired by Claire.

When You Do Have the Juice Like That

"Omg, khensani, are those swimming trunks? u r so creative!"
Hahaha, no, peasant. I'm just broke and always twenty minutes late to everything.

Fashioning short shorts out of your brother's too, too big swimming trunks will seem like a really clever idea when you're left with two minutes to get ready before having to head out. You'll tell yourself that your colour palette is so on point and you've just extended your wardrobe by another item for absolutely free, thereby creating a whole new plethora of outfit choices for the summer (which, you seem to keep forgetting, is almost over). You'll pair your cute new shorts with a thrifted button up shirt in your favourite shades of blue ("ah, look at how well they go together," you'll remark, "this was meant to be"), slip into the pink Pull & Bear trainers you're always wearing and never washing and throw a wink at the mirror before you leave with your thrifted jacket and the remaining trophies of almost-responsible-nights-out-when-you-didn't-lose-everything on your wrists and fingers.

You good-looking fool, you.

You're going to regret all of this when the hair-ties holding your shorts up keep getting lost, the drawstring of aforementioned shorts keeps giving up on you and your shirt exploding outwards and forwards, and don't even get me started on what a burden that jacket will become to you on the dance floor. I hope the compliments were worth all the anguish.

Jacket: Better Half Vintage // Top: Glitter Betty // Shorts: somewhere in the Seychelles // Shoes: Pull & Bear // Rings: [the store formerly known as] Sass Diva, Mr Price, LEGIT and a really nice old Turkish women in Osmonbey // Choker: Glitter Betty //

this is me thinking about how much easier my life could've been if I had just worn some jeans.

♡I'm not offline, I blocked you, asshole.♡ from 9arbage on 8tracks Radio.

Has anyone else made some terrible choices for the sake of letting your look live?

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Shades of Groove

I haven't slept in my own bed because there's a mess of gold stars and silver heart confetti on the sheets, the blankets smell like three different bottles of perfume and lavendar laundry detergent and the bed is lumpy from all the clothes I've shoved beneath it. I can't bring myself to clean it right now. I think because I've convinced myself I'm turning into a recluse, starving artist (I've been on a circumstantial diet of green tea, cranberry juice and bananas for four days), and, this, this is a trial for the books.

Never mind that I've started four screenplays and can't see myself finishing a single one and while I've drawn cartoons a plenty, I can't even face my art exam without having to pee first. In a feeble attempt to grasp at the straws of my youth, of a time when universities weren't the sole topic of all small talk and I could imagine The Future with a gaussian blur and purple tint, I'm turning to all the vices of yester me: waking up at six a.m after a night out to take self-portraits, screenshotting Kanye videos and singing Marina & the Diamonds. I don't know if it's working all that well.

I tried writing a short film yesterday. We meet this girl when she's waking up in the home of a stranger at 3 a.m. and follow her as she burdens the right-boy-for-her with her baggage and wish that she would quit playing around and let him love her, she leaves him at the cusp of 5 a.m. and then in the car on the way to school, she's a taxi with 'SEDUCTION' printed on the back window. We think she's having some sort of epiphany but instead she argues with her friends, hurts the right-boy-for-her and ends up in that very same stranger's home. She's hopeless to write a proper ending for, I guess.

I reread Cracked Up to Be by Courtney Summers and I think about how easy it would be to stop. Stop having pangs of anxiety over school projects and social obligations and just quit caring and "do me" but then I remember that, for right now at least, those things are me and I never see taxis on the way to school in the mornings.

  "Aries- Soon the fragility of your existence will hit you Aries and you will recede deep into your own mind, trying to cope with that." - Nightvale Horoscopes

Happy April everyone!

The Radio, They Don't Really Play Us

My life's turning into one long Jaden Smith ballad and it's a little trippy because I haven't slept in three days and I don't know how to count minutes but, wow, it's so good.

You don't think about how many things distract you or how much nothing you're accumulating until everyday you're doing everything and now there's always something and anything to do. My friend texted me the link to Jaden Smith's new album(?) (EP?) (great American novel?) on Friday and I've been a state ever since. I redecorated my room, taught myself some Photoshop, caught up on my journal work (both personal and Art) and made like 38380402 chokers and body chains for Glitter Betty. I also am finally up to date with Supernatural and I don't understand why there was a time I ever wanted to not be busy.

It's like on E!'s Fashion Bloggers when Margaret is like, "All I ever do is work and school." And then she mentions something about a boyfriend that obviously flew over my head.

Last year I printed out a couple of text messages from my friends and kept them above my bed but I preferred them around my mirror now, where I'll be forced to interact with them everyday.

Photo of my mom at a party back before I was born - so, like, hella nineties, man // Hamsa body chain over a Mr Price white lace bra I bought purely for Tumblr feels.

Flamingo and palm tree pendants from Mr Price and an Accessorize 'Make Your Own' necklaces strung over a wire hanger ("NO MORE WIRE HANGERS") // Elephant neckalce and gold bracelet from the Turkish Bazaar over a Van Gogh postcard from the time I went to the Van Gogh museum in Amsterdam // a Petra Collins photo on some red gumpaper from my old visual journal // Left to right: photo by Petra Collins, photo by Paul Ward and a photo from the Swedish House Mafia concert two years ago.

Top: Cotton On. Skirt: Glitter Betty. Shoes: charity shop (for R50 [$5] at a charity shop and they're genuine leather) (!!!). Chokers: Glitter Betty

I strongly doubt I'm going to be able to keep my wall this pretty for very long since I suck at keeping my room looking like anything other than a neglected charity shop. Anyway, what's everyone been up to? Any tips for not being such an organised mess?

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